“Have you noticed any changes with me over the last two years?” “I’m not sure. I don’t have a very good memory about that sort of thing.[1,2]” It’s been two years since I started Better Zombie. Then, I inconsequentially wasted time and money for hedonistic reasons. Now, I constantly strive to better myself, my work, and my environment through each of my writings. I’m still hedonistic, sure, I just act with more purpose. Let’s time-travel:
I thought of all the compromises I’d negotiate as I ran toward the bus I certainly was missing. I’d realized I’d forgotten my wallet too late into my bus stop journey. After retrieving it, I thought of stopping to send correspondences with my status and apologies. Maybe what stopped me was not wanting to so easily be conquered by trivialities? I arrived at the bus stop just moments before my bus, and with something more!
I realized a problem with myself: I wasn’t writing daily. Even though I was publishing essays daily, there were days I’d only write a few hundred words, so I agreed to dedicate myself to writing at least 500 words daily. If you want to be something, do it daily. This dedication has taken discipline, sacrifice, and stress. There are still days where I don’t write 500 words. Through all that, here are 425 words on what I learned:
Welcome to the new format! Better Zombie has changed significantly since the last Betzom update. Now that I have an average of 15 essays scheduled to publish, I have more lead time before each essay publishes to be more ambitious with the content or structure. More importantly, I’ve more fully realized how this website can help me achieve my goals: now, I’ll publish two short stories each week, along with two brainstorming updates to “The Story!”
Nothing is more frustrating creatively than being unable to execute upon your imagination. You might perfectly envision something while laying half-asleep in bed, yet when you ready your tools, something doesn’t translate! The writing’s flat, drawing’s weird, or project’s just not progressing. How do you fix that? For my development of “The Story,” it’s simple: don’t give up! Keep writing/working, worldbuilding/developing, and planning on what’s easy, constantly working on harder material, until it’s all natural!
Spoiler Warning Scale: None (brainstorming tactics) WANNA CONSIDER WHY YOU SHOULD BALANCE SMALLER AND LARGER PROJECTS? AND WHY YOU SHOULD GO THE DISTANCE WITH YOUR PROJECT? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!
It took me years to come to terms with my addiction to perfection. I would only want to consume good media and consuming bad media would make me feel terrible. I’ve now come to accept what is merely good enough by sifting through the inefficient moments of imperfection in media, and especially life, to find those useful nuggets of information. Drop it if it has no immediate redeeming value. Accept its faults and press on!
My bull-headed dash through 501 essays has taught me to eschew listless energy. I’m focused on what directly or indirectly helps my mission of becoming a professional writer. When times are bad, escape into nuances that might push along the mission. When times are good, go full-bore! The more practice, the less insecurity I’ve felt over trivialities, enabling “this” to become a natural part of my life. Writing is as subconscious for me as eating breakfast.
Perfection is the enemy of self-confidence. There is no more prominent a killer of people than their sense of having made an irreversible mistake. Businesses that fail to adapt, because they had once perfected a technique, will surely fail in the future. How do we prevent this? Part of it might be remembering that there is no perfect stick of gum, or perfect angle with which to affix that gum to a charming gum wall!
I find I lack self-confidence most when I’m considering my recent mistakes, historical errors, and avoidable wrongdoings. In those moments, how do I- we- press on? What if there were one guaranteed “thing” that you were better at than anyone else? That despite adopting professional or personal personas, it’ll be so true you could never fail at being number one doing? No one else can be better at being you… than you! Now proceed confidently!
Stop defending yourself! Quit justifying your existence, your actions, or your life’s intentions to every person you observe. We’ve got it all twisted. Sure, it’s important to explain ourselves to our family and close friends. They’re invested in our future and our failures could drag them down financially or emotionally. Everyone else, though? Who cares! Why invest your energy in the stranger that might scoff at you? All that does is lead to feeling insecure!