It took me years to come to terms with my addiction to perfection. I would only want to consume good media and consuming bad media would make me feel terrible. I’ve now come to accept what is merely good enough by sifting through the inefficient moments of imperfection in media, and especially life, to find those useful nuggets of information. Drop it if it has no immediate redeeming value. Accept its faults and press on!
My bull-headed dash through 501 essays has taught me to eschew listless energy. I’m focused on what directly or indirectly helps my mission of becoming a professional writer. When times are bad, escape into nuances that might push along the mission. When times are good, go full-bore! The more practice, the less insecurity I’ve felt over trivialities, enabling “this” to become a natural part of my life. Writing is as subconscious for me as eating breakfast.
Perfection is the enemy of self-confidence. There is no more prominent a killer of people than their sense of having made an irreversible mistake. Businesses that fail to adapt, because they had once perfected a technique, will surely fail in the future. How do we prevent this? Part of it might be remembering that there is no perfect stick of gum, or perfect angle with which to affix that gum to a charming gum wall!
I find I lack self-confidence most when I’m considering my recent mistakes, historical errors, and avoidable wrongdoings. In those moments, how do I- we- press on? What if there were one guaranteed “thing” that you were better at than anyone else? That despite adopting professional or personal personas, it’ll be so true you could never fail at being number one doing? No one else can be better at being you… than you! Now proceed confidently!
Stop defending yourself! Quit justifying your existence, your actions, or your life’s intentions to every person you observe. We’ve got it all twisted. Sure, it’s important to explain ourselves to our family and close friends. They’re invested in our future and our failures could drag them down financially or emotionally. Everyone else, though? Who cares! Why invest your energy in the stranger that might scoff at you? All that does is lead to feeling insecure!
“There are two types of people. The people that see something weird and figure it out, like you, and the people that see something weird and ask you to figure it out for them.” The opening act haven’t (yet) figured out how to be good career performers, whereas Uriah Heep certainly did! Let’s explore vicariously through good and bad rock bands how we can exude confidence after figuring out the weird nuances of our careers.
Instead of highlighting my favorite Top 10 of the past 70 essays, let’s focus on how you can replicate what I’ve learned! It’s all structure and consistency. Once you’ve built a structure you can use when you have spare time to invest and have honed your discipline to remain consistent, it’s possible to succeed. Before explaining those details, here are 4 WordPress shout-outs to new subscribers, likers, and commenters: Pam Gaines, Defining Yellow, Fractured Faith Blog, and Dawn!
My addictions strangle me when I’m unable to cope with situations. Hearing bad news kills. Chilling, defined here as succumbing to any addiction, then feels acceptable. If you’re anything like me, we need to re-enforce our defenses, rather than ask that the constant barrage of life’s perhaps-positives and perhaps-negatives cooperate with us. It would be nicer to have a conflict-free life. That won’t happen. Let’s instead try figuring out how to build up our defenses.
“You’re a rockstar!” That’s the most consistent compliment I’ve received throughout my career. Every positive interaction I’ve had with any rockstar has had two factors, their humble upbeat attitude and leaving you feeling great, with the 10 minutes hanging out with fans waiting to meet Albert Hammond Jr (guitarist from The Strokes) particularly reinforcing that notion. Let’s explore 5 factors I’ve noticed from rockstars and how you can apply them, even if you don’t like rock music!
I think we focus too much on what other people think about us. When I’ve felt awkward, it’s usually because I’m thinking too much about what people think of me while I’m doing something. It’s all in my head, too. No one ran up to me exclaiming that I shouldn’t photograph this sign. Most people wouldn’t even care. If they did, it’s only because I distracted their own focus. How can we overcome focus insecurity?