[Sober/Confidence] Defense Against Chill

My addictions strangle me when I’m unable to cope with situations. Hearing bad news kills. Chilling, defined here as succumbing to any addiction, then feels acceptable. If you’re anything like me, we need to re-enforce our defenses, rather than ask that the constant barrage of life’s perhaps-positives and perhaps-negatives cooperate with us. It would be nicer to have a conflict-free life. That won’t happen. Let’s instead try figuring out how to build up our defenses.

WANNA READ A COMBINATION OF APPLIED SELF-CONFIDENCE AND SOBER LIVING ON 4/20? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Fiction Practice] The Old Guy

“OK, Jane. We have time for one more question.”
“What’s the successful candidate look like in this role? What should I focus on to prevent myself from being unsuccessful?”
“Well, lemme tell you about the old guy. What a lazy bum! Couldn’t do nothing! He couldn’t understand anything we’d give ‘im! We’d tell him repeatedly how to do his assigned work and he’d seem to just forget! Stay away from the guy you are replacing![1]”

WANNA READ ABOUT AN INTERVIEW GONE WRONG WITH JUST ONE QUESTION? OR RATHER, HOW ONE QUESTION CAN REVEAL WHAT IS HIDDEN BENEATH THE SURFACE? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Applied Self-Confidence] Get Over It

I was feeling stressed out until Gogol Bordello kicked into the chorus of “Break the Spell,” just as I’m usually always despondent after hearing bad news, until I breathe in deeply and accept the circumstance. No one died, nor will die because of this. It’s unfortunate, sure, but that makes for good writing fodder, so get over it! That’s not meant to be callous or superficial. It’s just acceptance is the first step toward resolution.

WANNA CONSIDER HOW GETTING OVER IT MIGHT BE THE BEST ADVICE EVEN IF IT MIGHT BE BLUNT? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Applied Self-Confidence] How To Forget

I used to profoundly respect anyone’s opinion. It’s not that I’m some kind of awful curmudgeon now. More that I refuse to freely accept anyone’s subjectivities about the world, or myself, until I’ve listened with my empathically critical ear to validate their true intentions. If the argument is reasonable enough, I’ll buy it. If not, I move on with my life. Why obsess over negative thoughts? Why not forget and carry on? That’s easy, right?

WANNA CONSIDER HOW LETTING THINGS GO CAN HELP BUILD YOUR MENTAL FORTITUDE? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Book Review] Discipline Equals Freedom (2017)

199 pages leaves no padding to hide behind. Eloquent sweet nothings are not present here. “Jocko” Willink doesn’t pull any punches with Discipline Equals Freedom: Field Manual. He is on a singular mission to teach us how to combat the lazy or unmotivated moments that unsuspectingly tempt us with “sugar-coated lies” found in fast food or unearned leisure. These are your enemy if you have any ambitions or if you want to keep what you’ve earned.

Rating: ★★★★★ [5/5]

WANNA READ ABOUT THE SORT OF DIRECTED DISCIPLINE AND SELF-IMPROVEMENT YOU’LL READ IN THIS BOOK? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[The Story] Meeting New People

How often do you meet new people? Not just regurgitating scripts during transactional interactions with humans, either, how often do you allow yourself open up so that new people can meet you? That does require the vulnerability of letting your guard down, inviting people to see your ego’s grit, and possibly getting hurt. “The Story” will focus on many people and encounters, centering around Trishna (left) and John (right), almost as guides through their world.

Spoiler Warning Scale: Minor (philosophical character-building!) WANNA SEE HOW JOHN AND TRISHNA MEET OTHER FICTIONAL CHARACTERS? AND HOW THIS ANALOGY WORKS WELL FOR MAKING NEW FRIENDS? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Sober Living] Path of Redemption

“Don’t go to the dark side.” “I’ve been there. It’s not really fun. I’ve been trying my best ever since to not go back[1,2].” Since becoming sober nearly 5 years ago, most of my actions have been about making the world a better place. I’ll act selfishly sometimes to avoid going back to the dark side, otherwise, my actions mostly center around helping others: acting without judgement, lending a hand, or even just not being shitty.

WANNA CONSIDER HOW EASY IT IS TO FOLLOW OUR PATHS TOWARD BECOMING LESS SHITTY PEOPLE? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Applied Self-Confidence] Gathering Empirical Evidence

I’ve found I’m the most self-confident after planning how possible scenarios might happen. If X happens, and I’ve planned some counter-offenses, I’m more comfortable than just jumping in. Sometimes, you just need to jump first, then plan mid-jump. If quick-wits aren’t required, build a compelling case using neutral evidence so you’re more likely to win, because if the battle is fought on a hill you’re willing to die on, at least give yourself survival options.

WANNA READ AN INNOCENT EXAMPLE THAT CONVEYS HOW IT COULD GO WRONG? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[The Story] Meeting Their Villains

The ideal world would not have any villains. We’d go about our peaceful days without conflict. This “drama-free” world would not be functional, however, because by our very natures we have different interests and therefore investments. I’d rather wake up early to write broadly about how John and Trishna (right), main characters of “The Story” might overcome adversity, here shown as Dr. Mindbender (left). You might prefer clicking on the link/image below to continue reading.

Spoiler Warning Scale: Minor (just chatting about psychology/backstories)
WANNA STOP SIGHING LOUDLY OVER HOW CORNY THAT SEGWAY WAS AND KEEP READING ABOUT HANDLING CONFLICT? YOU KNOW YOU DO. CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Applied Self-Confidence] Way To High

I’ve been raked over the coals over asking to keep the dollar per hour “I earned as goodwill for my work on [ailing project][1],” reamed for talking to other recruiters within the agency over roles, railed on for asking for certain rates, and have dealt with enough recruiters to see their manipulation a mile away. Here’s a recent conversation with some recruiter that reached out about a project. See if you can spot the manipulation:

WANNA READ A CAREER STORY CROSSOVER THAT PROVIDES A REAL-WORLD EXAMPLE OF APPLYING SELF-CONFIDENCE? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!