“I got some new batteries for the monitor on my rowing machine.” “I don’t think those will be enough to power a rowing machine.” Since getting back into rowing in March, I only just started to maintain the machine itself. I took it for granted. The machine has been too reliable, you might say, to concern myself with minor maintenance. It’s been fun working on the machine along with working on my health and fitness.
WAC 314.11.015 3(g) often causes me to choose reclusion. I am fed up with this! “Employees may not…” “Permit any person consuming, or who has consumed within the licensed premises, any type of marijuana, usable marijuana, or marijuana-infused products to remain on any part of the licensed premises.” While concerts are the riskiest, I’ve smelled cannabis in libraries, restaurants, buses, and everywhere in downtown Seattle. My safest route to avoid imposed psychosis is to stay home.
When all systems are working, the temptation is forgoing maintenance. Everything’s working, after all, right? I’ve been tempted by that sin before. My poor rower is long overdue for a thorough repair. Everything’s still in working condition, so I’m starting a maintenance schedule that works for me. I’ll do a sweep, clean, and check every Saturday with a more detailed version every month. I just need to build a dedicated kit, including manuals and schematics.
Starting four years and eight months ago, I began developing mental fortitude against temptation, negativity, and the stresses that would otherwise compel me to numbness through alcohol. This pursuit of sobriety propelled me into self-improvement, which I partially credit for my endurance to evade sketchy situations in my conscious life. How about in my unrestrained dreams? Where anything is possible, including finding myself pouring vodka into this very glass, splashing in some orange juice, and…
Word brevity prevents sentence clutter; room tidiness prevents house clutter. I was hesitant upon hearing my rowing stats platform would double their posting character limit because my writing has benefited from word count limitations and character restrictions. Just like decluttering a space, it’s tempting to fill in the new space with junk. If you’re careful with your planning, you can be effective with your storage solutions. Fitness is the same: rowing consistently prevents weight clutter.
Don’t run from your pain! Whether it’s a something physical like an injury or something mental like ennui, learn to embrace that pain. Pain will remind you of your motivations more than the seduction of any numbing pleasure. Pain will be with you always. Pleasure is fleeting and addicting. Pleasure will leave you in both your darkest hours and when everything seems wonderful, whereas when disciplined properly, pain will be motivation toward achieving your goals.
Physical fitness is a daily decision. While making smart decisions throughout the day to eat better quality foods can help me feel better, I’ve found that exercise more directly inspires my diet. When I haven’t exercised or thought about aspects of my personal fitness, my cravings that day will go toward junk food or impulsively getting a second plate of Thanksgiving dinner. When I have, I’m more interested in eating healthier foods and smaller portions.
We need more authentic anecdotes about psychosis in mainstream media. At no point prior to trying cannabis had I heard anything other than untrustworthy horror stories equating cannabis to heroin. Similar to abstinence-only sexual education, once you invite the idea that there will be idle curiosity, you can talk about responsible drug use. If there had been some character in some sitcom that had any semblance of reality, maybe, I would have heard about psychosis.
There’s a point along your fitness journey where people start noticing. If you work with a professional trainer like I did years ago when I burned 60 pounds in 6 months, the spotlights quickly shine curious optimism on your efforts. That first journey accidentally recessed 67 pounds due to lacking discipline. I’m going at a slower pace for this journey, in ways that should allow my health to shine brightly for years, and people are starting to notice!
I just snuck an extra benzodiazepine from their hidden stash, and was debating when to ease my anxiety, before fully seeing this beat-up keychain I found during a decompression walk. I put back the same medication I had been prescribed after my panic attack and continued my day. Even years later, there are days when it would be nice having that crutch to fearlessly ease into social situations. That’s when I must “stay strong” most.