In order to write “The Story,” I have to be well enough to work, and not just to work, but to write. I wrote Novel 01 while I was working and I will need to do the same for Novel 02. For novels after that, I’m not sure. Would those novels support a humble life of writing and engaging with reality in a meaningful way? If not, I would need to work at other tolerable enough jobs.
From August 31 2020 to August 12 2021, nearly two years, muscles in my body caused havoc. I lost my job because of these muscles. I was demeaned in many ways by many of the employees of the American Healthcare System from doctors to medical staff. All because after my surgery, my surgeon was ignorant about pelvic floor muscles. How will that influence “The Story?” I wrote Novel 01 before becoming disabled but I cannot write Novel 02 without those experiences.
I’ve been burning through my life’s savings and by this essay’s publication, I’ll hopefully be planning to move somewhere cheaper, or even better yet, have figured out the physical problem preventing me from working, so I can return to work. Taking “The Story” will take several more years to write, and if Novel 01 had anything to show, writing isn’t a sprint but a marathon. To write Novel 02, I need to secure the finances to write.
To write “The Story,” I had to write Novel 01, and now with my planning essays for Novel 02, I wondered something this past week: Just how big is Eville Medical? Is it the major hospital of the city of Eville? If so, is it attached to the University of Eville? If so, then my career and life experiences are focused outside of the university environment, so, I won’t know some of the larger hospital details, yet.
There is no happily ever after for disabled folks. We may live good enough lives, but we’ll never live the same as able-bodied folks, even outside of discrimination against our bodies and minds. “The Story” introduced me to the idea of disability advocacy years before I became disabled myself. I won’t comment above the jump about Novel 01‘s ending, but will Novel 02 have a decent ending? Answering that question spoils Novel 02 before I write it.
I’ve been trying to do long-long-long-term planning in life as a way to wade through my healthcare nightmare. Part of this includes imagining how I’ll logistically write “The Story.” If I’m able to sustain myself on writing, then, would I spend every waking second writing like I did with Novel 01? No, I would probably want to take three days off a week from writing fiction for the novella, Novel 02, and beyond to keep things balanced.
Before I can write “The Story,” I feel I must first practice other writing. I did so with Novel 01, where I imagined Eville Medical as a decently-sized hospital. Now that I’ve been to basically most every hospital in this area, I wonder as I am doing my Novel 02 plans, how big will Eville Medical be? Is this hospital a major hub for doctors? Or is it a smaller hospital? Could Eville Medical successfully diagnose FND?
I’m publishing this essay on my birthday. Will my health have improved by then? If matters are marked as “urgent” that need to be, versus the “normal” or “neglected” priorities that my healthcare has been marked as for years now. My pace for writing “The Story” will be different than writing Novel 01. When I get better, I intend to first edit Novel 01, second write the novella, third write Novel 02, but, not at an urgent pace.
This week in healthcare could be best summarized by being brutalized by the bureaucracy of the American Healthcare System. No one seems interested in helping me as a patient. One thing I can do with “The Story” is advocate for better patient healthcare. I did a little bit of this with Novel 01, and with Novel 02, I imagine I can do more of that through directly showing how the American Healthcare System is influenced by bureaucracy.
Over the past two years of my disability, I’ve had to put “The Story” on hold. I’ve had two fewer years of my life to study fiction writing because of my disability and the doctors who failed to help as much as they could have. I wrote Novel 01 in a month. I technically begun writing Novel 02 while I was in the hospital. Over the past week, I’ve dumped many new ideas into Novel 02. It’s exciting.