Although player-versus-player is the primary playstyle of ENDLESS WAR, a Discord MUD, there are more ways to play as reflected by the in-game leaderboard. I’m disinterested in provocating hatred toward me, even in something like a PVP MUD, because many people take being killed – the core gameplay mechanic and premise – surprisingly seriously. When I’m killed, whatever, right? Can we take that same mentality of life? That there are more ways to play and become successful?
I picked investing in slimecoin as my primary gameplay style because you can’t lose it.
Until we upgrade seasons, which could anytime and will clear out all this effort any of us put in… wasting all that time… but really, all of our efforts toward everything in life is meaningless unless we assign our own meaning from them. Working any job is worth the money if your goal is acquisition of money and property. I’ve met many people over the years that value money over their own personal health, and will therefore go into more stressful jobs because the pay is more, or they will sacrifice elements of themselves for their paycheck.
I’ve done the same and will continue to do the same well into my career.
I am just not seduced by tradition. I have no outward interest in owning a house, an expensive car, and the luxuries of having all the money to do whatever I want except actually do whatever I want. While I might prefer not to be in a situation where my downstairs neighbors smoke enough pot to waft into my apartment-mansion and randomly work on extensive construction projects, where I am in life is fairly copacetic toward my the playstyle I want to apply to my life. Writing is the most important thing to me, by far, and is something I’ve done without fail for years now. There are times when I may slip or may let other goals distract me more, but overall, each day I focus my life around the idea of asking myself what I want to write about and then writing about that thing, even if it meanders and evolves as I go.
The three main playstyles in ENDLESS WAR are PVP, I guess PVE, and socialization.
I say player-versus-environment with some reservation because when I go into the mines to !mine for slime, I don’t attack any players, and I won’t unless provoked – the original gameplay mechanic was designed around settling arguments, rather than killing random people without provocation. So although I’m a Killer in this PVP world, I’m neutral enough to where other than occasionally throwing shade at the opposing Rowdys, I’m not tearing down other people’s efforts to build up my own.
I’ve joined into a friendly opposition against the other leading slimecoin baron.
Nothing I can do in-game will negatively affect RCeizure’s slimecoin count.
By having both of us represent our own teams on the leaderboard, with this drawing being thrown in as some friendly provocation, we can ensure the wheels of our gameplay will have some sort of value. I’m not just earning slimecoin as an excuse to clear my head and get some items to equip on my character. Those are the internal reasons. The external reason is to represent my team.
That’s the same as people wanting to start a family and have kids.
If, say, their internal motivation is to experience the joys and sufferings of child-rearing, then their external motivation is seeing that child raised into an independent person. That child, however, has no stakes involved in that process, but will usually act to that external motivation, even adopting it as their own internal motivation, thus perpetuating the cycle. Survival is the most important gameplay mechanic to evoke in life, after all, because that means more opportunities to expend time and effort for various rewards.
What rewards work well for you?
I’m not interested in being the baddest dude in town. The most I want out of life is being able to live it on my own terms, each day, where I wake up and do almost everything I want until I go to sleep. I am flexible in that. Today, I have to leave the apartment-mansion to go to physical therapy, which isn’t something I’m completely looking forward to since that means I’ll need to expend certain efforts and concern myself with current events, but I’m fine with it. I’m even fine with working a full-time job. What I’m not OK with is living with such chronic fatigue from a job that physically and mentally drains me past the point of exhaustion, past overexertion, to breakage.
I’m not sure what my options are to fix that.
I’ve told colleagues that I’m willing to be paid less for easier work. I know others that have declined promotions because of the increase in responsibility. If I derive more pleasure from earning fictional currency in a game that could be randomly reset than real currency, there’s a problem with the effort involved with making that real currency. There are more factors involved with any job than pasting “!mine” into a chatroom for minutes on end, but I’ve had jobs in the past where there’s a middle-ground between that and the overly-complex, mindbendingly-challenging, socially-insular work I am currently employed in.
How can I find that middle-ground again?
Through clearing out all the clutter that necessitates additional brainpower and physical storage to store, I can focus my energy on what I enjoy, which is writing or living life on my terms, when I am not yielding my time to obligations – work, self-care, socializing, et cetera – rather than spinning my wheels as I have over things I don’t care about. When I return to work, I’ll summarize these and other thoughts in a conversation with my management.
Eventually, I’ll find a playstyle that works well for my lifestyle.
|Quotes:  I tagged RCeizure and this was the response.  This was my response.|
|Sources: My personal and professional experiences.|
|Inspirations: Meditating on my life as it is and figuring out how I can live a life that I feel more confident and happy within.|
|Related: Other Applied Self-Confidence and Media Meandry essays.|
|Picture: A drawing I did in about 15 minutes.|
|Written On: 2020 May 04 [First draft; final draft for the Internet.]|
|Last Edited: 2020 May 04 [First draft; final draft for the Internet.]|