[Applied Self-Confidence] Thirty-Four Years Old

Comparing last year’s surface-level aesthetics to this year’s, not much’s changed. I’m still in the apartment-mansion. Some objects probably haven’t even moved in that year; closer to most. Yet, digging deeper, I feel like I’ve made substantial progress in many important areas, even if I’ve regressed in some other important areas. I’ve written a novel since last year! I may write another before I turn 35! If it weren’t for health degradation, I’d say life’s better…

WANNA CONSIDER SOME BIRTHDAY PLANS IN TERMS OF LIFE GOALS? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Tripping On…] Lower Back MRI

Astute readers will recall my brain scan MRI from earlier this year. My brain was unremarkable to Neurologist-Number-Two, and my headaches were eventually determined to be caused by upper-back pains, but now that I’m experiencing frequent lower-back pain, who’s to say that there isn’t a nerve that’s not causing both upper and lower back pain? It’s possible. I’m no doctor, but considering how much my condition has degraded over the past three months, anything’s possible…

WANNA CONSIDER HOW THE MORE THINGS CHANGE ABOUT LIFE THE MORE THINGS… CHANGE FOR THE BETTER? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Rowing Machine] 2020: Week 32 {202.0} “Starting With Ten”

Four days ago, I did ten strokes without the bar on my rower, and stopped once my legs hurt. Throughout physical therapy, I went stationary biking for longer, with the secondary purpose of getting me back into rowing, with the primary purpose of reducing my lower back pain. Three days ago, I went for twenty-six strokes without the bar. I didn’t go yesterday or today because I went to PT and did other activities respectively.

WANNA SEE HOW I KEEP TRYING EVEN WHEN ADVERSITY SEEMS TO CONSTANTLY TRY TO STRIKE ME DOWN? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Tripping On…] Topiramate And Tizanidine

I’ve been taking the nerve medication Topiramate and the muscle relaxant Tizanidine for a few days now. While I wouldn’t say they are a chemical love story, like PiHKAL or TiHKAL, they’ve begun offering some relief, perhaps. As I told the physical therapist, I felt at about a 5/10 for general health, compared to the 2/10 or 3/10 averages I was feeling throughout the past two months. If 10/10 is achieving the impossible, then I suppose 5/10 isn’t terrible, currently…

WANNA CONSIDER THE EFFECTIVENESS OF MEDICATIONS? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Media Meandry] Given Unlimited Time

Given unlimited time, either in a given day or lifetime, how would you spend it? For me, I ask myself that question – indirectly – daily. It’s not so much a question about whether I’m using my time as efficiently as possible as much as whether what I’m doing is what I’m enjoying the most. If I’m listening to music I don’t enjoy, even if I have unlimited time, I have unlimited resources to pick something else.

WANNA OVERCOME THE FEAR OF MISSING TIME? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Tripping On…] Physical Therapy Walking, Part 24

In this penultimate visit to physical therapy, on my second round of visits, I’m not completely better. I am substantially more educated in physical health, own physicality, and ways to help prevent long-term issues, perhaps. It’s tough, though, because for example, no matter how I sit, I can’t find a comfortable position. Everything hurts my spine. Standing also hurts. But if I lift my feet up off the ground, it can help readjust my posture.

WANNA CONSIDER HOW YOU MIGHT BE HURTING BECAUSE YOU’RE PUSHING YOURSELF ACCIDENTALLY? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Media Meandry] Keep It Open

If there’s one thing I’ve learned while reading Picture Of Dorian Gray, it’s overcoming the romantic notion that books are sacred, and should be read within some sacredly focused mindset. If the book resonates well, then sure, read like that. If the book or any media doesn’t, then it’s alright to keep the book open in a tab and read a paragraph while something loads, like we would spend that time reading a text message.

WANNA MEANDER THROUGH OUR SELF-IMPOSED SACRALITY OF MEDIA? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Tripping On…] Deceptiveness Of Appetite

At 12:51am, I wrote “immediately after eating the clam chowder,” I had debated making in yesterday’s essay, and I was going to continue by saying that my appetite had been restored. It’s just before 6am now. I ate some food, but the thing about having lived in constant pain for so long is that fatigue, hunger, and general consciousness blend together. I could stay awake for five days without sleep and not even feel tired.

WANNA CONSIDER WAYS TO PREVENT GRIEFERS – WHETHER PHYSICAL OR MENTAL – FROM ACTIVATING ONE’S STRESS-EATING COPING MECHANISMS? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[The Story] Trishna’s Muscle Strength

I wrote about my accidental method writing for “The Story” in regards to John, whose physicality I can most politely describe as weak, introductorily. Not as in weak-willed, but as in physically weak. I’ve wondered about Trishna. She, also is not weak-willed. She isn’t particularly weak, either. But still, she needs to use a wheelchair to get around because of a bad foot, so while accidentally method writing for John, I considered Trishna’s muscle strength.

Spoilers?: Minor [establishing character physicality]
WANNA CONSIDER NEGATIVE MEMENTOS LIKE THIS ESSAY CAN HELP CAPTURE POSSIBLY POSITIVE FEELINGS, PART TWO? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Tripping On…] Pain Reduces Appetite

What I found most interesting about this health issue I’ve been resolving, where my spine is not responding well to anything we do to work on my posture, is that with my increasing pain, I’ve had essentially no appetite for weeks. I’ll eat, sure, and the food will be nice, but I haven’t had the “need” to eat. Without desiring food, without hunger, throughout the past two months, I have lost 20 pounds, which wasn’t good…

WANNA CONSIDER HOW, EVEN IF YOU TRACK YOUR HEALTH, YOU MIGHT NOT NOTICE EVERYTHING? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!