[Rowing Machine] 2019: Week 40 {218.5} “Five Pounds Up”

I know why I weigh five more pounds than last week. Specific stress points and general stressful factors enabled dietary choices, usually passable, to be stress-seductively over-indulgent to where my cognitive discipline was weakened. There are better ways to deal with stress than eating, but if the stress is weighing down on you too much, you don’t have the energy to fight back. Suddenly, that second food portion might become your potion to fight back.

Many of these stressers will be resolved by this essay’s publication.

I will have switched over to night shift, which means less situations “vitriolic,” as I told a coworker. I will have been to another concert. I will have met up with friends and got sufficient sleep for the first time in what might be days or weeks.

I’m not beating myself up over last week.

If my weigh-ins show anything, it’s that I’m just as much of a human as anyone else. My weight fluctuates. I like chicken pot pie and if there are no portions rationed out by packaging based on calorie counts, sure!, I’ll have more!

I might have still had weak willpower against that.

Honestly, I’ve been burned out by this current job, and I think it’s the daytime culture. I will probably end up moving around the country, taking odd jobs for minimal wage, still, and will deal with far worse. It’s like this: When you buy something cheap, you expect it to break sooner than something expensive.

This job is that “something expensive.”

If I were paid less, then I’d care less because I could always find other work. Once you’re in a sufficiently professional gig, your life cements. You professionally grin and bear the stresses that are innocuous irritants. Not quite enough to report but not quite enough to forget.

I’ll endure it for a few years more

I have pounds to go in my personal fitness journey and pounds to save in my personal finance journey. I’ve been doing well in both, even if I weigh more than last week, and even if I bought an extra book and LEGO minifig than I absolutely needed. Between years ago and now, I know these items and others are the byproducts of good intentions. I like these things and will enjoy them frequently.

The extra foods I ate were healthy for me.

They weren’t burgers and fries, deep-fried grease, high fructose corn syrup, or pizza. I just had a few bites more than I should have had. I admit this all to you here because once is fine, but more than that enters the excuse and abuse territory. I have seen the trends that caused this weight gain – easy access to food without clear portions and unaddressed stress. I can work on the former. I do well with meal preps. Addressing stress, though, is a beast unto itself.

The only way to solve it is to keep talking about it, complain even, until you find solutions to try out.

Quotes: None.
Sources: My fitness experiences.
This week’s weight: 218.5
Last week’s weight: 214.0
Difference: Nearly five pounds.
Inspirations: Besides the weight gain, just general thoughts and musings about my life.
Related: Past weekly column entries.
Picture: A quick drawing on my phone.
Written On: September 29th [26 minutes, 455-521, mobile]
Last Edited: October 2nd [Minor edits during the publication process, so, second draft; final draft for the Internet?]
My big goal is writing. My most important goal is writing "The Story." All other goals should work toward that central goal. My proudest moment is the most recent time I overcame some fear, which should have been today. I'm a better zombie than I was yesterday. I'm not better than you and you're not better than me. Let's strive to be better every day.