[Rowing Machine] 2021: Week 06 {213.5} “Physical Therapy Restarts, Part 28”

After my last physical therapy session, I decided to go somewhere else. I wasn’t happy with the physical therapists I had. Sure, my case is complex, but they weren’t giving me effective exercises, and some of the exercises arguably furthered the damage to my spine. The major downside to this new physical therapy office is that it was a 15-minute walk from the parking lot.

The physical distance is all of about a few hundred feet.

I forgot to look this up before writing this essay, so I’ll take a brief look now. That 15-minute walk to the physical therapist’s office was all of about 500 feet. After the appointment, it took me 45 minutes to walk back to my car. I was so exhausted from that walk that I’ve been feeling OK but rather burned out. I had a bowel movement prior to the appointment and I noticed that the point of my body that hurt the most was actually that point. I’ve had some bloody bowel movements because I’ve had such terrible constipation that my body is not used to pooping at its regular once-daily pace, so when I go, I have so much matter to pass that it just is not a fun time. It wasn’t even a particularly painful bowel movement, but moving around the little bit I did hurt significantly.

Now my left side hurts the most.

It does hurt more when I write about it, so documenting the pain is not really the best idea, but there’s not much else I can do when writing these sorts of health update essays. I’ve restructured my writing and my lifestyle to where I might only write these essays weekly now. It’s not like I’m writing anything new. The information is new – I went to a neurologist recently, at the second opinion of my pain management/sports medicine doctor, and that neurologist was a piece of shit that couldn’t have cared about my health any less. That’s nothing new. I took a COVID test. I don’t have COVID. That’s nothing new.

I took a lung/pulmonary function test and couldn’t even register a reading.

In the patient portal section where I could see the results, it was listed as “pulmonary fun.” It’s fitting because I’ve been having trouble breathing for the past few hours. I can breathe manually but automatic breathing seems to be inhibited by the pain in my spine.

I have to step away to take another Oxycodone to restore my breathing functionality.

I had initially thought that I could do as much as I could without taking Oxycodone, because America has become so obsessed with treating their patients with the least-effective options possible, creating addicts to substances they can’t get to manage their symptoms. I ate a bunch of food and then took one after I realized it wasn’t helping. When I went in for the lung test, the person that gave me the test told me that their child had their Wisdom teeth but was not given pain management medication, so their family collectively scrounged up any remaining Vicodin or other medications they had around to help the patient recover.

This was America before COVID, and during COVID, it’s become even worse.

The thing I’ve noticed as I’ve taken Oxycodone is that it hasn’t actually helped much at all. I am not getting “better.” In fact, I would say I’m actually getting worse overall. My mobility has decreased from previous months. The main positive that this Oxycodone prescription has provided me is that the pain symptoms are lessened. I was having trouble breathing not because I didn’t get up in a while, but because my body was spasming out at the pain. It couldn’t handle the pain symptoms much, so, it seized up.

I am learning first-hand how it’s like for people living with Asthma.

When I talked to my primary care physician about the lung test results, he said that he doesn’t think it’s a lung problem but a pain problem. He is going to get me an inhaler but doesn’t think it’s going to help much. He recommended Acetaminophen and Aspirin along with the Oxycodone and I’ve found that combination to be helpful. I think it’s similar to when I was having the inflammation problems last year that were resolved with Prednisone. When I took it last, it wasn’t the most effective, but it helped. I felt the same sort of pressure relief then as I do now, although now it’s on a much smaller scale. My tailbone hurts, my side hurts, and everything else still hurts, but it’s to a lesser degree. When I have my follow-up appointment with the pain/sports doctor, maybe I’ll bring it up.

Last time I talked with him, though, he wasn’t happy with me.

He was mad that I wasn’t able to figure out the physical therapy stuff and he was mad that I wasn’t moving around. The physical therapist, at least, practiced some basic human empathy. He knew that if I moved, it hurt, so although that was causing problems, at least it makes sense. I’m still having a lot of health problems and I guess it gets worse when I think about it and write about it, but it’s necessary for me to do so as a document of the process of what’s going on.

What was just September’s minor lung pang back is now January’s breathing problems.

I feel like most doctors are more like Dr. Acula, or Dracula, in that they are more interested in poking and prodding me, sucking the life out of me, more than actually doing anything to help. I don’t know how other doctors are like, but I know that I had seen several doctors before COVID, and several more now. It’s not like I’ve just had bad luck. I think it’s literally impossible for most doctors to empathize with me.

Oh well, I’ll just keep pressing on toward better health…

Quotes: None.
Sources: My fitness experiences.
This week’s weight: 213.5
Last week’s weight: 212.5
Weight Difference: Up one pound.
Difference between writing and editing for publication: I got incredibly sick from some spicy food earlier this week, so added onto my on-going spine issues, I wasn’t having a fun time. Physical therapy didn’t help much, but surprisingly, being inactive for nearly a week helped calm down my spine’s pains enough to where I feel somewhat better for having gone through those spice pains.
Inspirations: I haven’t written as many of these essays over the past two weeks since I was writing my end-of-2020 essays. I realize that writing essays like this might actually be somewhat harmful now, but, writing them is important for documentation’s sake.
Related: Past weekly column entries. Sober Living essays and Tripping On [The American Healthcare System] chapters.
Pictures: Template
Written On: 2021 January 02 [9:15pm to “restore my breathing functionality” at 9:28pm; 9:44pm to 9:58pm]
Last Edited: 2021 January 02 [First draft; final draft for the Internet.]
My big goal is writing. My most important goal is writing "The Story." All other goals should work toward that central goal. My proudest moment is the most recent time I overcame some fear, which should have been today. I'm a better zombie than I was yesterday. I'm not better than you and you're not better than me. Let's strive to be better every day.