My kinda work has always been customer-facing. Sometimes that’s led to new friendships and other times, my compassion has been tested and broken. There are days where people will either innocently or intentionally be so rude that I can’t help but not feel excited about helping out the next person. I suppose the thing toward developing a thicker skin is not letting those things bother you, but how? Take everyone here rude significantly less seriously.
There’s respect, trust, and admiration.
Respect is a matter of understanding that the person exists as their own person. They may be kinda weird, but you’ve gotta respect them anyways. I defined that out because, without that sort of baseline, we get into encounters where customer service is tested to its absolute limits. You have to be a saint to work with some of these people, and if they had just come into the conversation with the slightest amount of respect, everything would be fine.
If respect is the baseline, trust is earned.
Trust is something that I can infer quickly based on what someone says. But the bigger question we should ask is: why should we give our trust and admiration to basically anyone? They should be earned through multiple interactions, so anything other than that baseline respect shouldn’t be handed out freely. If that’s the case, then when we encounter situations where dudes are rude and everyone is terrible, why fret? We should only be concerned about people that we trust or admire – which, should be few and far between.
Otherwise, everyone gets a baseline level of respect and that’s it.
When I keep that in mind, life tends to go much better, because I’m not looking for external validation for my own insecurities. I can be myself and live my own life. When others comment on things about me, either through trolling or through better intentions, it’s easier to let that slide off. The thing is, though, we’re not really trained in this as part of living in this new society of being constantly connected to everyone else. We probably used to have our time away to decompress, manage our stresses, and relax.
Now there is no time for any of that.
People will vent at any possible avenue because it will boil over otherwise, and yet, if we just took the time to breathe, calm down, and realize that if we don’t place trust or admiration in strangers, yet still respect them well enough, we can proceed with our lives un-fretted by everyday frictions. I’ve accidentally been rude to others and others have been to me. It happens even to our good friends and family. Why would we let this bother us more than just as a footnote? Why do I let thoughts of interactions from days ago creep into my mind? Does it serve me in my present? No. Does it serve my future? No. Why can’t we let all that go?
Should we admirably serve our disrespectful, untrustworthy customers?
|Sources: My personal experiences.|
|Inspirations: People at work and online are the same, in that they’ll bother you, but you can also decide not to let their comments creep in. Otherwise, you can go mad.|
|Related: Other Sober Living essays.|
|Pictures: A recent comment on my Steam profile from someone annoying. The game is Tumblestone. I like it, and I got some free copies, but I last played it over five months ago, since I haven’t been interested in playing videogames lately.|
|Written On: October 18th [13 minutes, from 12:55am to 1:26am minus breaks from “what someone says.” at 1am to “But the bigger” at 1:16am and from “why fret?” at 1:17am to “We should” at 1:20am, Wordcounter]|
|Last Edited: October 19th [Second draft; final draft for the Internet.]|