Yesterday, I went to the thrift store and the supermarket. I had the physicality to push a shopping cart and walk around slowly as I looked at various items. Today, I woke up to a headache with lower back pain, including my tailbone. Was the adventure worth the pain I experienced there, and would I do it again? I suppose in some sense, it was good to see where my physicality is at right now.
Although meeting with my spine doctor yesterday, two weeks before he retires, didn’t seemly resolve my hurting tailbone issue, it did introduce a logical solution. I predicted this. He’s retiring and didn’t study my medical records because he was merely assessing my current condition and advising before retiring. He recommended that I talk to my pain management doctor and if my spine had problems… unfortunately… the old spine doctor. It’s been exhausting working through this.
WANNA LEARN TO BECOME AN ADVOCATE FOR YOUR OWN CARE? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!
My short-term health goal is waking up and going to bed without experiencing any pain. My long-term health goals have that as the baseline and expand on that through being able to do any light to moderately taxing task I want. I have a heavy-duty jumpsuit I may never wear again because I don’t anticipate doing any heavy labor work again. If I can achieve those goals, I’ll be happy with my overall physical health.
WANNA EXPLORE THE QUESTIONS I CAN’T YET ANSWER? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!
I don’t know how long it before I can row another good set. I’ll either wake up unexpectedly to some new spine pain or will feel moderate to severe spinal discomfort now. I can’t sit that much. I skipped my thirty-minute timer to stand and walk around before writing this essay because I just woke up and felt well enough, but now I’m starting to feel moderate discomfort. I’ll probably rest after finishing this essay.
“There is a 10% chance of reinjury.[1]” I suppose that statement from my current spine doctor answers the question about whether I will ever truly return to 100% physicality again. Even though I imagine I can start rowing again by this essay’s publication, while writing this in mid-September, I’m not sure to what capacity I’ll row again. Do I need/want two rowers? I can still exercise and get into better health, but the specter of reinjury looms…
I had my first physical therapy session since I had my surgery and my second since my old spine doctor wrote a prescription for physical therapy. I would have gone more than that, but I was in so much pain prior to surgery that I couldn’t tolerate much more. Even now, I can’t do much, but it’s still nice to be able to go again. I’ll next go after visiting with my new spine doctor.
WANNA SEE HOW I’M DEALING WITH MY SPINE’S SLOW HEALING PROCESS? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!
Even though I don’t feel 100% better after my surgery four days ago, and also haven’t defecated in that long although I have urinated, I am feeling well enough to walk around without substantial spinal pain, which is a marked improvement for me. The day after I got home from surgery, it took 30-45 minutes to stand up from the toilet. The next day, 10-15 minutes. Now, it’s less than 5 minutes and only expending minor energy toward standing.
There have been moments throughout this process of spinal degradation where I’ve slept well enough or rested long enough to where I feel like I’m able to take on what I once could even four months ago. The need to fulfill an errand. The desire to clean up around the apartment-mansion. These thoughts are deceptive because while I might be able to get partway there, when my body invariably tears, I’ll be left aloft, unfair.
Three days ago, I received another hurdle I would have to jump over to get my spinal surgery. I still have many more hurdles to jump over, but this one involved the surgical assistant. I was told that Ivanka is out of network and I would be billed for her services. Shit. What does that even mean? Well, in my impaired physical health, I did my best to decode, answer, and resolve this health-impacting question.
I didn’t need to use a cane to walk around until I started getting headaches. I think those headaches, which I experienced late into 2019 and until early 2020, were probably caused by the same spinal problems I’m experiencing now. They were just minimized with certain factors that are no longer avoidable. It’s unfortunate but at least I have coping mechanism tools to deal with this situation until I get the help I need to recover permanently.
