[Novel 02] “Perform Positivity, Please”

Well, it’s difficult to get online and not express myself honestly. I don’t know how this will turn out long-term on days like the day I’m writing this where I’ve felt like shit physically, and now mentally, for long enough to where it makes doing much of anything difficult. I do the best I can to express positivity elsewhere. I guess building “The Story,” as I learned with “Novel 01,” means progressing through “Novel 02” and beyond.

Spoilers?: Minor [long-term planning details]
WANNA CONSIDER HOW PIDGEONHOLING YOURSELF INTO A BOX OF POSITIVITY MIGHT PUSH YOU OUT OF THAT BOX? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[The Story] Energy For Perseverance

Although I’ve had a good success rate with doctors, the pain I woke up with today was one that couldn’t be quieted by the prescription painkillers I’ve been given as the stopgap as we figure out what’s wrong with my body. On days like today, I’m not productive. On days like today, I look to “The Story” for energy for perseverance, and wade out the pain until it calms itself down for a better tomorrow.

Spoilers?Minor [life inspiring fiction]
WANNA READ ABOUT HOW THINGS HAVE BEEN FOR

[Tripping On…] Constipation Weakening Physicality

I wasn’t able to pass a bowel movement in almost a week that I began feeling sick today. Constipation is a side effect of taking Oxycodone, which I was prescribed to manage my continued pain symptoms related to my lower back and tailbone, but days of taking Colace weren’t helping. Well, I spent the better part of four hours and an entire roll of toilet paper, but I managed to pass five pounds of feces.

WANNA READ ABOUT MY EXPERIENCES WITH CONSTIPATION AS A WAY TO EXPLORE ANY POSSIBLE CAUSE TO MY HEALTH PROBLEMS? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Tripping On…] Thwacked By “Bat”

The premise that painkillers can be addictive is absurd to me. Although I have a new prescription for Oxycodone to manage my pain symptoms, I don’t feel compelled to take more of it than necessary – or even any of it, as my spine is currently hurting – like I might feel compelled to eat some sugary sweets. Oxycodone “addiction,” for me, would be like being addicted to the icepack applied after being thwacked by a bat.

WANNA CONSIDER THAT ONCE YOU’RE HIT BY BATS, THAT PAIN IS FAIRLY EASY TO MANAGE? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Tripping On…] Future Finally Brightening?

Good news! I met with my new dual sports medicine and pain management doctor today. Although today’s meeting was similar to other meetings I’ve had with other doctors, there was one major difference between today’s meeting and others: actionable items. My general rule of thumb now is that if I meet with a doctor and that doctor doesn’t directly order any tests, that’s a red flag that they aren’t a good doctor. Let me explain:

WANNA READ ABOUT WHY I’M FINALLY STARTING TO FEEL LIKE I CAN BE OPTIMISTIC ABOUT MY HEALTH? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Tripping On…] Spine, Sports, PCP

The meeting with the spine doctor didn’t point to an answer. I was once again referred along to a sports medicine doctor – a new one this time, and I almost gleefully canceled the appointment with the other sports medicine doctor – and back to my PCP. It seems reasonable this time. Instead of being dumped off without any sense of patient care, this time, at least, going to both of these doctors could help me out.

WANNA CONSIDER HOW TIRING IT IS TO KEEP ON GETTING PING PONGED ALONG? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Tripping On…] Bed All Day

I technically wasn’t in bed all day today as I did wake up at around 8am to pretend to feel normal, only to be so exhausted that I went to bed at around noon, if not sooner. It’s past 7pm now and I’m only out of bed to write this essay. I barely have the energy to write this essay, and I am frequently plagued by the many pains I have been experiencing; increasing daily…

WANNA READ WHAT LITTLE I COULD WRITE OUT OF BED TODAY? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Tripping On…] Pain Ever Experienced

I am not generally a fan of the 1 out of 10 pain scale that doctors use in the American Healthcare System. It’s a way of applying objective numerical data to subjectivity. The pain I am experiencing right now is not something I could properly convey to you without giving you examples of how I’m feeling or how my body is physically breaking down, and I write excessively. If I said it was a 9/10, that feels objective.

WANNA READ ABOUT TODAY’S PAIN? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Tripping On…] Good, Bad Days

On days like today, I feel good and bad at the same time, sometimes, interchangeably. I feel good because I’m not in extreme pain, but I feel bad because I am in pain. I feel good because I was able to bathe for the first time in probably almost a week but I feel bad for not being able to do that more often. After meeting with the doctor, will I have more good days?

WANNA CONSIDER WHETHER THERE ARE TRULY ANY GOOD, GOOD DAYS FOR PATIENTS IN THE AMERICAN HEALTHCARE SYSTEM? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!

[Tripping On…] Sleeping Less Often

There is an opposite to the pain that forces me into slumber I haven’t written about much and that’s the pain that wakes me up after two hours of slumber and keeps me awake for far longer than necessary. I am toward the tail-end of one of those experiences now. My lower back and left leg are combating for my consciousness’s complete attention. I couldn’t sleep now even if I were to go to bed.

WANNA READ ABOUT MY EXPERIENCES AND MAYBE, TOO, BE KEPT UP AT NIGHT A LITTLE? CLICK HERE TO KEEP ON READING!