[Downsizing Zeal] No Story Mode

Shield Hero is an anime/manga about a guy that’s found himself an unlucky participant in a fantasy world or is about getting over romantic scorn. Every encounter you experience in life can be looked at from multiple perspectives. We try to focus on the empirical facts and indisputable evidence to guide us through the undulating half-truths of subjective reality, yet ultimately our internal storytellers guide us, as protagonists, through life. What happens when everything’s wrong?

I like to think of reality like narrative story branches.

There are certain milestones that, in hindsight, seemed like they must happen. It’s somewhat like predeterminism except it’s like rigid plot points – I must start this project here, I must end this project here – with the flexibility of how or sometimes when I get there.

These are mini-milestones in life’s adventure.

It’s problematic when we don’t accept these changes. The more patterns we observe in those subtly subjective undulations upon objective operations, such as negative body language, sarcasm, or delicately dismissive discourse, the quicker we can accept or react.

It’s taken me a few days to accept one change.

It must have worn heavily on my face at work because someone had pointed out something that unintentionally cut right to that change in my otherwise upbeat attitude. I had let it bother me too much, and why not? Everyone has a right to feel out their pain to overcome it. It’s just when you let that pain fester, as I had done, instead of addressing it like I am doing, then that pain controls us.

All stories are root Aesops covered with window dressing.

I watched the first episode of Shield Hero before all this happened and lamented over its cluttered, overwrought storytelling of a poor boy being betrayed by seemingly everyone. He lashes out and hates everyone over his situation. “It could have been cut in half and nothing would have been lost,” I thought… before I experienced something similar the next day.

It’s still clumsily directed but an effective analogy.

In life, we allow outside forces to control us in everything we do. Some provide for us, others enrich us, and still, others give without expectations. To get out there and experience these ups, downs, failures, and victories only help us ride steadier in life. A person who has not made a mistake has not done anything, as they say, and the same applies to hurt feelings and conflicts.

I will go through and edit out old references.

I debated this for days. Up until this writing, I have stood by my opinions and information as I knew it, and generally, I have not written anything externally controversial enough to warrant concern. I don’t do “takedown pieces.” I am not completely innocent in this situation, in that I could have communicated clearer and more politely. But it happened. Certain actions cannot be repaired.

I will go back through the 49 references and edit them to Blah Blah, with brief timestamped editorial footnotes.

Quotes: None.
Sources: My Blah Blah experiences.
Inspirations: I’ve been in a terrible mood the last few days and wanted to write broadly about what was up. I feel like I’ve mostly got through all of it, maybe because of writing like this, where the end goal is to directly fix the issue, but the writing is indirect enough to explore any possible avenues along the way.
Related: None.
Photo: The yielder of the marker dragged its felt blade across the markerboard slowly, as though savoring the moment, and tentatively, knowing that action’s consequences. I drew my smile near it, defiantly spoke about how I had prepared for this all along, but in a subtle coup, no one resonated. Within a month, my access was cut. Or maybe it happened differently?
Written On: June 19th [26 minutes, mobile]
Last Edited: June 20th [Minor edits; otherwise, first draft; final draft for the Internet.]


My big goal is writing. My most important goal is writing "The Story." All other goals should work toward that central goal. My proudest moment is the most recent time I overcame some fear, which should have been today. I'm a better zombie than I was yesterday. I'm not better than you and you're not better than me. Let's strive to be better every day.