“Home is where you can be you.” “There’s the quote.” “Yeah.[1,2,3]” Part of this extended process of detaching from my home I’ve built up over the course of seven years has been to learn to become more comfortable being “me” while abroad. My social anxiety is when I’m too focused on keeping my mask on, being a certain way, or having to be concerned with how my persona is perceived. Instead, just be you everywhere.
What would you need for a weekend away?
Shirts, socks, underwear, deodorant, and maybe some more things? Laptop to work, phone chargers to continue working, and maybe a pen and paper for jotting notes? Maybe a book? How about all the decorations you keep around you? Those are nice-to-haves, but what’d be the point of bringing a whole bunch of stuff along with you for a weekend?
Decorations don’t necessitate a home.
It’s more comfortable being surrounded by objects that make you happy and being in a space where your perturbances are minimal, yes, but what if you could be out in public with possibly hundreds of people looking at you and still feel that same way? In an age of violent attacks against strangers, it might seem like staying out of the public is the safest way to go, but the thing is that such incidents are dramatized disasters that nearly never happen. Yes, it’s tragic, but the likelihood for anything to happen to a complete stranger is so rare that it’s just the media hype machine manipulating our core sensibilities.
Instead, just get out there more often.
Rather than hole away at home, just being around other people more often can lead to this effect where you focus less on yourself and your actions. You become comfortable letting others tell you about their boring stories. When you’re out, that sense of being you – regardless of how outside the norm you may think you are – decreases to the point where you realize that you’re just one of over seven billion weirdos in this weird planet.
Embrace your inner sanctuary.
Say you’re out in public and there’s a momentary sensation of dread or depression that might not have happened at home. What would you do at home? Find your comfortable spot, sit down, relax, and maybe distract yourself long enough to let those malaises pass by? The same can happen out and about. It’s just there are more factors to ignore. That comfortable spot might be wherever you can find. That distraction could just be looking out into the vistas that remove yourself from current malaises and anxieties.
For me, it’s also being able to dress how I want.
I am almost, by obligation, beholden to the idea of not wearing sweatpants or pajama pants out in public. Wouldn’t it feel more comfortable to do so? Although home, for me, is where I can be my most comfortable, I should also learn to be more comfortable out and about.
“Make yourself at home” wherever, whenever.
|Quotes: [1,2,3] My friend Jacob, then me, then my colleague as we were interviewing people.|
|Sources: My personal experiences.|
|Inspirations: Having just spent a weekend away from home, it was a great way to detach from this experience that is moving out, but it was also a number of days not spent packing.|
|Related: Other Moving Zeal essays|
Above: My laptop while on-assignment.
Below: My misprinted mousepad.
|Written On: January 29th [30 minutes]|
|Last Edited: First draft; final draft.|